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Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Big day tomorrow

Ok, so I remembered to vote on Tuesday. E. was QUITE the help. The little old ladies running things were charmed by her. E. got some of the "I voted" stickers and stuck one on my belly and said, "This one's for your new baby, Mama." She made me wear it all day--even to the store.

We also got the movie "Cars" yesterday. I can say that this is yet another movie that is ruined for me. The child wants to watch it over and over and over. Not the whole thing, she likes to pick out certain parts. She likes the new short, "Mater and the Ghostlights" quite a bit. And the tractor tipping. I must admit, that part ALWAYS makes me laugh. What can I say? I have a juvenile sense of humor and have been cow tipping so.... :D

Today has been a very anxiety filled day. I cannot get the U/S off of my mind. It's tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. I've only been this anxious a couple of other times in my life and they all had to do with Drew. I felt sick all day long but couldn't get sick, if you get what I'm saying. I really hate that--the sick feeling that doesn't stop. See, I'm babbling because I'm so scared. I don't think I'll be getting much sleep tonight. E. gets to go into school late tomorrow because she wants to see the baby on TV. She can't fully understand that it won't be Baby Drew we see on the TV though.

E. is still breaking my heart; telling me that she wants Drew back and that she misses him. I'm so damn mad that she will have this shadow of the death of her baby brother hanging over her for the rest of her life. It's not fair to her or to the new baby. Right now, that's what bothers me the most. You want your kids to have happy, perfect childhoods and E.'s is forever tarnished. (Although anyone who is around her can attest that she's an EXTREMELY happy child. She always has a smile, a hug, and a kiss for you.)

Anyway, we hope to find out the sex of the baby tomorrow and maybe we'll settle on names (R., are you hearing me?!). I want this kid to have a name; I don't like calling it "it" or "the baby." However, we're having name issues at the moment. It would be much easier if we didn't have to agree. He should just listen to me and go with it, right?! In my dreams. There's really only one boy name that I like and R. really dislikes it. I'm not crazy about his boy name choice and we haven't even started talking girls. I did e-mail him a list of names over a month ago. :)

I want to thank everyone for the supportive e-mails that I've received regarding tomorrow. They really mean a lot to me and are helping to calm me a bit. Keep your fingers crossed that all we see tomorrow is a normal baby.

3 comments:

kctwinmommy said...

I wish you luck tomorrow with the u/s! I hope it all goes well so you can enjoy the pregnancy a bit more. I know you said you've had so much anxiety, it has to be so hard!! Let us know how things go when you can and (((HUGS))) Oh, and hopefully you can find out the sex so that you can just tell R. that this will be the name! LOL!!

Cindy

Gina said...

I will be thinking of R, E and you tomorrow! Please post an update as soon as you can.

Shawn C said...

Jana,
My fingers are crossed! Good luck, tomorrow!
Will WE get to find out if it's a boy or girl tomorrow too?? PLLEEASSEE!!!