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Wednesday, July 05, 2006

No title

Another post already? Yep, I need to ramble on some more.

I was getting worried about Lauren because I hadn't heard from her in a while. Thank goodness she's just having computer problems.

I really wish that medical bills would stop coming in the mail. *sigh* They're all for co-pays and deductibles at this point but they add up to quite a bit of money. But I think the one we received today *should* be the last one. At least the insurance company straightened out their error and we don't owe the $53,000.00 that OU billed us. Also thankfully, the medical expenses will be enough to deduct on our taxes this year. Plus funeral expenses and all of the normal stuff. We should get a nice refund so there is a bit of a silver lining to all of this money shelled out. :)

There was a bill waiting for me when we got home for Drew's medical records. I was kind of scared about how much that would be but it turns out it will only be $49.20. Whew! So I guess we'll have his complete medical records soon. I don't know if I'm ready to read them, but I need to have them for when I am ready.

I saw my doctor again today for a check-up. She increased my dosage of antidepressants. I kind of thought that she would because even though I can tell a difference, it's not a very noticeable one. I've lost 2 more pounds in the last month. Not as much as I'd like but at least I'm not gaining. Elizabeth climbed up on the table, laid down and told the doctor, "Listen to my heart. Make sure it's ok." It was. :)

Speaking of E., she's been a holy terror lately. She is not acting like my funloving child AT ALL and I'm getting tired of it. Throwing things, hitting people, tantrums over every.little.thing. Yes, I know it's normal at this age but it's just so unlike her. I'll be glad when it's over. She can still be so sweet though. Today when we were in bed waiting for her nap to come (which it never did), she said something about Drew. I don't remember what but I told her, "I miss Drew." She responded, "I miss Baby Drew too. He's in the cemetary. If he was here, I'd take him to Wal-Mart and share the cart and my choo-choo train with him." (The little train outside WM's door.) I just started crying and she wiped my tears away and said, "Mommy, please don't cry. I love you!" So sweet...then she was up throwing things again. Ugh.

Bear with me as I work on the thank you notes for the book donations. I'm getting them slowly done. I really don't know how to thank everyone for contributing. And if you still want to contribute, remember that we'll be accepting donations until July 31st. :)

4 comments:

Karen said...

I understand how your daughter is acting I have two little girls of my own and know that they can be a handful. She my be missing her brother and not know any other way to express it. Emotions are tough when you're little. Drew was a very handsome little man and from the pictures it's easy to tell that big sister loves him very much. Give her some time, let her vent, and then see if she wants to do something special for her brother. Let her paint a picture or make a dream catcher or put her handprint in clay and hang it in the window for Drew to see. It might be a way for her to feel like she is still a big sister no matter what.

Karen said...

I understand how your daughter is acting I have two little girls of my own and know that they can be a handful. She my be missing her brother and not know any other way to express it. Emotions are tough when you're little. Drew was a very handsome little man and from the pictures it's easy to tell that big sister loves him very much. Give her some time, let her vent, and then see if she wants to do something special for her brother. Let her paint a picture or make a dream catcher or put her handprint in clay and hang it in the window for Drew to see. It might be a way for her to feel like she is still a big sister no matter what.

Tasha said...

My daughter is 14 months and has morphed from a sweet little baby into a toddler pretty much overnight! She hasn't quite reached the "terrible 2s" just yet but she's getting close! I am sure that Elizabeth is having trouble dealing with Drew's death and that is part of the reason she is acting out but I am sure a lot of it is the age as well. I am scared of that age just from reading all the horror stories!

She sounds so sweet though! Her comment about taking Drew to Walmart made me cry and then to read that you cried and how she told you she loved you had me crying and smiling at the same time! She is a very special child, I can just tell! I really can't imagine all the pain you all have been going through and I sincerely wish I could just take it away!

But for now just know you are in my thoughts and prayers, as always!

Love,
Tasha

Carole said...

I don't even have enough words. I cried about Elizabeth saying she would share the cart and the train. We've prepared Zak for the possibility that the doctor's might not be able to help our baby...but it's just so very cruel for a child to face loosing a sibling. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
~Carole